Hawaii

I was most blessed to get to spend some time in Hawaii. Now, i got a bit lucky. Some of my family work for an airline that flies there. And from time to time, they're able to help their family out with the price of the airline ticket. Thus, Kickass.

So about two weeks ago, the idea concerning Backpacking in Hawaii came up. I was skeptical that I'd be able to go, because I'm out of a job. But I finished a wedding I was editing, and I got paid for it. Coincidentally, about two days before I left, I had two promising interviews with a local Starbucks..  So you can probably guess I was major stoked; Cuz I was able to go. Not only that.. But my roommate and very good friend Johnny got to go too. Thus, Kickass.

We departed on a 14 hour greyhound journey up to Portland, where we'd meet my cuzzo. And let me tell you folks, avoid the greyhound whenever possible. Use it only for emergencies. It's the Devils mode of transport- absolute Horror and torment. But... We made it. And we were stoked. New city, new plans, new attitude. We jammed over to my other cousin's house and crashed for the night, after enjoying a cold one and some good catching up time with the loved ones.

At dawn we headed out for the Portland international airport and Flew up to Seattle. And from there, to a little town called Bellingham. It probably won't seem special to you. But my cousins live there, so it seems kinda special to me. 

We dillied and dallied for a while, seeing as how we had a few hours between flights, then we took off to the island of Oahu.

Now this is where the awesome stuff started to suddenly happen. Stuff I didn't expect.
Seeing as how my cousins are enjoyable folk, they're pretty well liked in the place they work. So we were blessed with being able to upgrade to first class.

Here we are, fresh off of the horridly grey greyhound, sitting on a plane in first class, mimosa in hand. Meal after appetizer after snack. Soaring above the Pacific, into the blue, orange, pink and red sunset. 

I mean what the heck man? What'd I do to
deserve that?

-another mimosa sir? 

-yes please. 

-another mimosa sir? 

-why, yes please! 

-a refill for you sir? 

-actually I'll try the Crater Lake Hazelnut espresso vodka. 

-refill sir? 

-heh, no thanks.

We landed. And I didn't know how things could've gotten any better. But you just wait.

After explaining to the flight attendants how simply fantastic they were, I stepped into the Hawaiian climate for the first time. Well the airport in it. But still. 

Then we stepped out of the airport... And I stepped into the Hawaiian climate for the first time.

Boom.

It's November. But it feels like it's dusk after a blazing day in July. If you know anything about me, that's one of the things you know. That's my favorite time of the summer. After the sun goes down. When it's warm enough to be shirtless and in shorts, grilling burgers outside without getting a sunburn. Bliss, but I digress.

We found a bus. Great.
After getting on, I quickly realized all of those rumors about Hawaiian people not liking tourists are most true. The driver didn't take to us very well, and was a little snappy. I thought she might be been having a tough shift, but then I saw her laughing and joking with others who stepped on. Psh.

We landed late, so we couldn't camp out just yet. So we got off the bus and found our little hotel room. Everything felt like we were in some Asian country instead of Hawaii. And technically speaking, we were. A little like the people in Hawaii, the English spoken word was a minority on all signs and labels.

 After waltzing around outside and watching two episodes of Archer on our little TV, we crashed. And very shortly after, we woke in paradise. We landed at night, so I couldn't effing WAIT to wake up. You see, I've never been to Hawaii. So you can imagine how excited I was to have Hawaii revealed to me by the morning sun.

Shortly after checking out, we left our bags at the hotel, and then snagged some deliciously cheap breakfast at a local joint. 

Then, we went in search of a mode of transportation. We stumbled across the nicest dude. In his late thirties and out of San Diego, he flew here for a social gathering of some sort once, and decided to stay for good.
He hooked us up with the cheapest deal for four mopeds between jokes and altogether positive vibes. Damn, I'm going to miss them mopeds man.

 While filling out his paper work, Johnny got a pageful of bird crap!! Hawaiian birds man, shooting to kill.

Aloha to you too, you feathered bastards!

Immediately, we began to smash. And smash we did. We zipped out of the God forsaken stereotypical city of waikiki, and into the true beauty of Hawaii -  the country.

 Zooming past cars, past organic fruit stands, past beautiful trees foreign to me. Past chickens running freely, surfers slicing through the Breaking waves. Past baby blue skies and worry free, perfectly filtered sand sloshed around by the water. 

It was then that I immediately realized something. All of the photos I've seen of the ocean in Hawaii... All of those blue-green Gulfs and lagoons. All of them were telling the truth. The water really is that beautiful color. Almost anywhere you go.

We spotted a little spot near the road, and took a quick dip. It was my very first time swimming in the ocean, and actually thoroughly enjoying it. The water was in every meaning of the word - perfect.

We headed inland. The warm air flapping our swim shorts and shirts dry. We drove into a pretty normal neighborhood sitting at the foot of a most unconventional mountain. You remember the beginning of Jurassic Park? Where they flew in on a helicopter and the white bearded dude was like, "There it is."

You're GOSH DARN RIGHT. That was where I was. Standing right in front of it.

We begin to hike. At first, it was nice. Then, it became a muddy, slip on your butt, walk through a river, everything is covered in orange-brown clay but you don't care because you're so stoked kinda nice.
   We ended up at a waterfall. The kind you see in movies. A waterfall that dropped into a deep pool that is as fresh as the lemonade I drank before this flight. 

BTW, thanks Alyssa, you really know how to squeeze a lemon.

While hiking back, I slipped and fell on my rear end. The funniest part is that it happened while I was talking about how I was starting to enjoy the slipperiness of the ground.
    .... Welp, I felt silly to say the least. But it was soo priceless.
After being covered in clay and developing a smidge of trench-foot, we washed off in the river and smashed back to the hotel. 

We got our bags and cruised out of the city, towards the food. 

I enjoyed Uncle Ole's special at Papa Ole's.
I recommend it.

After that, we jammed to the place we wanted to stay the night at. And on the way, the rain began. 

Now, I've heard of the Hawaiian rain. It starts suddenly, rains hard, and ends quick.
It's true.
And driving on those mopeds going about 40, we were getting pretty wet and pretty chilly. 

But it really did end quick. And we made it.

Trouble was, the gate was closed to where we needed to be. Without a second thought, us three hefty dudes lifted the mopeds one by one over the short fence, and flawlessly made it behind enemy lines. 

Now normally, if you want to sleep next to the Hawaiian ocean in a place that's all to yourself, you'd have to be a rich fellow, or a local.
But I could not be more certain that God was on our side, because only someone like that could give you a taste of paradise. 

(shot close to midnight, exposed for quite a bit)

The air was warm. Not 30 feet from our tent and two hammocks was the Pacific Ocean. The warm, inviting, peaceful as all the heavens pacific ocean.
We had sat there for what must've been an eternity just staring and soaking it in. There was no words I could've or can say that can describe it. The peace. The perfection of the clouds above us. The fact that the rain had stopped just prior to us getting to the site. The clouds unveiling the full moon....  Casting the most perfectly soft blueish white glow on the white breaking of the waves. 

This super-overedited cellphone shot kinda looks cool doesn't it?
Kinda like a weird painting or something, huh?

To top it off, the sand served as a perfect Cupholder for our ice cold Longboards.
Life was perfect, and then I passed out in the hammock. Perfectly hung next to my cousins Eno, in the nest of a tree on the beach.

I went to sleep in paradise, and I woke up in it. 

Cousin Nasty took this photo. She's a skilled Grapher of the Photo.
Check out her blog -- Anastasiabulanova.com

... It's a glorious day when morning comes. Without the feeling of alarm.

     OK so here's where it got exciting again. 

We needed a permit for this place.
We had no permit for this place.
And along with the gorgeous weather, the park Ranger was at the entrance to our campsite just CHILLIN.
Uhhhh.... Crap. 

So we got all Navy Seals on them. After quickly packing up, we walked our mopeds to a different entrance through the sand. Have you ever tried to walk a moped through sand? Crap man, it's hard. Took more work than hopping the fence!

But we got it. Walked our mopeds out onto the parking lot, within eyesight of our badge-wielding antagonist(s).. Started them up, and drove right out the front door.

Flawless.

After we got out there, laughing and smiling about how sneaky we were, we headed to Kono's for breakfast.
I recommend it.

(this is Johnny. He's got a blog too!)
Johnnysyres.tumblr.com

Without exaggeration, I had the best breakfast wrap of my 22 years. It blew my socks off.
So I tucked my socks into my shoes and my shoes into the moped. Riding those barefoot is something else, lemme tell ya.

Another token of perfection was the fact that we had more cousins there at the same time, chillin.

So we skedaddled over to them and they were gracious enough to take our packs off our backs for a while.

Our loads lightened, we headed to a place called Kahuku grill. I ordered a plate of two kinds of shrimp. Coconut and garlic. Best meal I ever Had. The salad. Omg.
The rice. Ugh. 

Next to that spot, is one of the best shaved ice joints you can scope out. The flavors I got were Dragon's blood (strawberry, don't trip), blue Hawaii (Vanilla coconut), and passionfruit (passionfruit).
Condensed milk on top of the spherical rainbow, stabbed with a straw, one hand on the steering wheel, flying down the road on my moped. ..man.

Waimea. A beach that was as perfect as the one we slept next to. In its own perfect way.
That was the next order of business. 

The waves were huge. And it was then that I realized how much of a failure the wave pool at waterworld was.
If you catch them at the right time, and swim towards the beach before it breaks behind you, they can carry you all the way there.
I spent a good amount of time doing this body boarding thing. It was bliss.

On the way back, we stopped at one of those organic fruit stands. After a spot of bargaining, we scored some freshly sliced, Ice cold pineapple with refreshing coconut to complement it with.
It was then that my cousin, bless her soul, almost let the moped drive away without her. Definitely a few laughs in there. I love you Nast.

We smashed past the huge white rotating windmills. You know,  the ones that make electricity. They're really awesome. I mean, I was in actual awe at how big they really are up close and personal.

We found a place that serves hot Hawaiian rolls with peanut butter and vanilla ice cream.
..... Could things be more perfect?
Yep.

We met my cousins at the apartment they were staying at and were privileged with a hot shower and the use of conditioner. My goodness, conditioner.
After swimming so much in blissful salty ocean, your hair becomes a single mass man. And with my uber-thin hair, I'm Frigging pulling it out trying to get it to cooperate. Conditioner folks. Put that on your Hawaii checklist.

The sleep. Oh, the sleep we got.
We slept like steamed vegetables. Tired after all of the swimming, laughing and chowing.

In the morning, we had to leave that cute little family.

We met with yet another cousin that was visiting the same Island with his wife. They're such a adorable couple.

They let us stash our packs at their hotel room, and then we all got breakfast at a place called eggs'n'things. 

A waffle the size of my face with freshly chopped pineapple, and macadamia nuts covering a mountain of whipped cream.

That, and the coffee I was drinking both were definitely having a ballroom dance in my mouth.
One of the most delicious waffles! 

--And it was in Hawaii.                                                                           ...Geez

After that, we said our goodbyes. 

We needed to drop Anastasia off at the airport. So she left early. And then we went to pick up our packs from the hotel room.
Well we sort of did. Because after we returned our mopeds, we spent a hour or two watching death at a funeral.
I recommend it.

It was time. Time to leave.
Right before, we stopped by a joint called Huladog. Where they make a life-altering hot dog.
It isn't split. It's toasted from the inside out on a piping hot metal spike. Making the inside of your hotdog crunchy. The Polish dog inside was blanketed with mango relish and Hawaiian pineapple mustard.... Geez.
That came with a lemonade squeezed right in front of me. The exact flavors i got, I can't tell you unfortunately.

The wonderful worker lady in there made me a lemonade the way she would make it for herself. And it was pretty. Frigging. Good.

While I sipped the last of that sweet, sweet lemonade, we said our goodbyes and thankyoues and hopped on a city bus.

The trip to the airport was melancholy. But it was balanced with a cheerful and smiling bus driver, bless her soul. We walked into the airport- out of which it seemed we just stepped out.
We got our tickets, and got on the plane.
We sat in the very back and kept on talking about how absolutely blessed this trip has been.
How absolutely perfect this trip has been.

 The plane took off, flying over the bottom half of the Hawaiian Islands. All of them seemed so serene. So peaceful. They seemed to say, while shrouded in the gorgeous pink, and blueish white cotton-candy clouds, "See you next time."

I didn't think it could end more perfectly. But because of the fact that Joe works for this airline, one of the flight attendants treated us to three ice-cold Longboards.

How absolutely immaculate.

..............oh and we landed in oakland